That was the question my coworker presented to me after a disturbing encounter with some credit union members. It seems an older gentleman had, in foresight of his advancing age, granted his two children Power of Attorney over him.
–for those of you who don’t know, Power of Attorney is legal authority to act in the name of someone else, a power granted you by that person—
Well, this fellow was in with his daughter trying to figure out where all of his money had gone to. There were only three people with access to the account: the gentleman, his daughter, and his son. Digging and research provided evidence that all of the money had been withdrawn by his son in abuse of the Power of Attorney he had been granted. The father, well into retirement, was now penniless but for his monthly retirement income.
“How could you do this to your own family?”
I stood there and reflected over the question and the incident. How could you do something like that to your own family? To the very father of your life? And wouldn’t you know, I was led back to a conclusion I’d made and mentioned before on this site: Family is a choice.
There is Webster’s family that is easy enough to come upon, but that isn’t what my coworker was asking. She wasn’t asking “How could you do this in a family like the one Webster describes?” She was asking “How could you do this in a Family like the one I have that means everything in the world to me?” Birth, blood, residence, relation, none of these things make family meaningful. In order for Family to be great, and for Family to mean something to any of us, you need to make that choice. Every member needs to make that choice and be helped in making that choice.
That young man is unjustified in what he did to his father. It was a disgusting act. There is no answer for it. There is however answer to my coworker’s question. “How could you do that to your own family?” It seems obvious that to this young man, there was no Family—only Webster.
Well, this fellow was in with his daughter trying to figure out where all of his money had gone to. There were only three people with access to the account: the gentleman, his daughter, and his son. Digging and research provided evidence that all of the money had been withdrawn by his son in abuse of the Power of Attorney he had been granted. The father, well into retirement, was now penniless but for his monthly retirement income.
“How could you do this to your own family?”
I stood there and reflected over the question and the incident. How could you do something like that to your own family? To the very father of your life? And wouldn’t you know, I was led back to a conclusion I’d made and mentioned before on this site: Family is a choice.
There is Webster’s family that is easy enough to come upon, but that isn’t what my coworker was asking. She wasn’t asking “How could you do this in a family like the one Webster describes?” She was asking “How could you do this in a Family like the one I have that means everything in the world to me?” Birth, blood, residence, relation, none of these things make family meaningful. In order for Family to be great, and for Family to mean something to any of us, you need to make that choice. Every member needs to make that choice and be helped in making that choice.
That young man is unjustified in what he did to his father. It was a disgusting act. There is no answer for it. There is however answer to my coworker’s question. “How could you do that to your own family?” It seems obvious that to this young man, there was no Family—only Webster.
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